Today at bible study the opening discussion is 'what are your passions'? I always consider myself a passionate person, but since I didn't hear very many responses (yes, we were late) I didn't really know what to say. I have thought about it all day...what am I really passionate about?
I know what I WANT to be passionate about...but what is it that really drives me? I think a better answer than the lame one I gave would be
my marriage, my kids, and homeschooling...all because those are my God callings. I know that I could have went back to work years ago...even though I am still having babies...I could have went back, I can now...and may at some time have to go back part time as we are in transition...but I am being used at home.
I don't always live up to my expectations of what that ministry is supposed to involve...in fact many times I don't - but I am still learning. I want my home to be one where my husband and kids feel safe and loved. I want it to be warm, inviting, open to friends, family, and even strangers if the need arises. So in many areas - that is not the case...but I am working on it! In my mind having an open home means ready...ready with a meal, a snack, something 'homey'. It doesn't mean that homes that don't have those things are not open - but MY vision of MY home is one where kids know that there is cookies on the counter. Or if they look they can find something yummy in the freezer. Where supper is a family event every day. Even lunch and breakfast are a gathering time. I don't need my house to be a show home...I need it to be a family home.
I find it hard sometimes to not let myself get so tied up in outside things that I neglect my home. I remember talking to my mother in law about it once. When she was a young wife and mother...she was a real housewife. And I don't mean because her house was immaculately dusted, or meals were perfectly prepared, I mean literally she was a housewife. She stayed home and kept her house. She didn't do the shopping, or errands on the weekdays...goodness - she didn't have a car - or even a license! It's funny, though, because while we were a one vehicle family...I stayed home. Other than the one or two days I would drive Greg to work so we could go swimming or go to Friday school - we were at home. And as much as I think that sometimes we need to go out...I also know that this week of having my own vehicle every day again has made it tough for me to be a housewife! Too many things that I can do outside of my house!
It is a good thing that God works with us in these things! I feel so glad we had that study today to help me think about this stuff...I need to keep these things in balance.
The other thing I was praying about today is that when I am home...I need to be working on my home. I need to prioritize myself...so that what needs to get done happens even if I do have a busy day with outside commitments. I want to go to Bible study, I have been missing it. I want to take my kids to Friday school. And I want to sign up for an excersise class at the pools for 45 minutes on Mondays. I truly believe that I can do those things, and keep my home as I want it...if I really set myself to finishing what I need to finish when I am home.
I am going to attempt to remain aware of this into next week!
Hopefully I will have good things to report by Friday!
Blessings!
C